Where to Now?
by DelenainLoVe
Summary: There aren't enough fanfiction stories for this incredible story so I thought I'd give it a go. So here we go, in eager anticipation of the movie . . .


**A/N: Okay, so this is my first attempt at an If I Stay, Adam/Mia fanfiction, don't be too harsh. I'm very excited for the movie adaptation because the book was absolutely incredible. I wanted to do this before the movie comes out on August 22nd.**

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_And then I squeeze._

_I slump back, spent, unsure of whether I just did what I did. Of what it means._

_If it registered. If it matters._

_But then I feel Adams grip tighten, so that the grasp of his hand feels like it is holding my entire body. Like it could lift me up right out of this bed. And then I hear the sharp intake of his breath followed by the sound of his voice. it's the first time today I can truly hear him._

_"__Mia?" he asks._

The next few seconds are filled with an all over numbness unlike anything I have ever felt before.

Then I become aware that I'm lying on my back in a small, uncomfortable hospital bed, one again with my body, and all I can register is the slight pressure of Adam's fingers wrapped around mine.

The beep-beep-beep of the many machines that surround my bed and the pungent smell of disinfectants hit me like a wrecking ball.

The fact that I can't open my eyes is the next thing that comes to me inside of my cloudy mind. Why in the world can't I open my eyes?

And then the pain lances through me. Oh the pain. Lets not forget the pain. Every inch of my body screams out in agony, not only on the outside but my insides hurt as well. My very soul feels like it is about to burst as I remember all that I have lost, and it is weighty and all consuming. It will most definitely leave a gaping hole in my heart that nothing will ever completely fill.

But feeling Adam there and recalling all the strength that Gran and Gramps and Kim and the nurses and Willow have given me definitely helps, they make that hole seem less daunting. I still have a family, it's just different from the one I had before that fateful car crash.

Yo-Yo Ma continues to play in the background, and Adam must have called one of the nurses while I was coming to terms with consciousness once again because the next thing I know, a tiny piece of tape is being pulled off of each of my eyelids. My eyes flutter open a few times, adjusting to the bright florescence of the ICU, but when they finally do come into focus, they instantly lock onto Adam's beautiful mix of gray, brown, green eyes. They are still the most beautiful pair of eyes I have ever seen, even through all the puffiness of his teary, blood-shot gaze.

My lungs are working just fine, as displayed by one of the machines, so the nurse removes the tube from my throat. It's incredibly painful and a twin set of tears fall down my cheeks.

She gently brushes the hair from my forehead, the only part of my body left uninjured. "Don't worry, sweetheart, I'm going to inject some painkillers. They'll put you to sleep for a little while. Sleeping makes the healing go faster," she tells me with a soft, reassuring smile on her face.

She, then, injects a clear liquid into my IV line.

I feel Adam's hand squeeze mine once more and blow me a kiss, I try to grin back at him, not sure if it worked or not, right before I begin to drift away.

There is only pain. My head, my chest, my ribs, my arms, my legs . . . burning pain. My side, everything down to my hands. Pain.

Pain and hushed words in the gloom. Where am I?

Though I try, I cannot open my eyes, my eyelids are just too heavy. The whispered words become clearer . . . a beacon in the darkness.

"How in the world are we going to tell her about her parents and her brother?" I hear Gran ask from my left.

And Gramps answers back in an equally despondent voice from my right. "Carefully. Very, very carefully."

Both unaware that I already know the fate of my parents and my younger brother. That I saw both my dad's and my mom's lifeless bodies lying on the pavement, and I figured out Teddy was also gone due to Willow's presence here instead of at the other hospital.

I feel myself fading away again and unconsciousness claims me once more, stealing me away from the pain.

I'm being moved . . . or well not me exactly but my hospital bed is being moved. My bed is being wheeled down the hallway, lights blurring by as I squint up at the ceiling. I slowly look over and watch as Willow, still wearing her nursing scrubs, wheels the cart of various monitors and machines beside me.

Into the elevator, then out of it on a new floor, to a fresh, private room where all of the noisy machines and wires are hooked up again.

Once that was done, Willow stays by my bedside and the two other nurses make there way out without a word.

A minute later, I watch as Gran and Gramps enter the hospital room, followed by Adam and Kim, then a parade of cousins, aunts, and uncles come in to join us. But as happy as I am to see everyone, the crowd just makes it so much more obvious that there are three critical missing pieces in this scenario.

I suddenly have the overwhelming urge to break down in sobs.

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**A/N: Please leave me a review below!**


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